“There is no more foul or relentless enemy of man in the occult world, than this dead-alive creature spewed up from the grave.” (Take that, Twilight fans)
Directed By: Tod Browning
So we’re taking a trip way back, to just a couple of years after Dracula was released. And we have kind of a mash-up of genres. This is set up as a mystery first and foremost, being as we have a murder in a small Bavarian town, where the owner of a castle is murdered, drained of blood.
“It’s a zoo, not Jurassic Park.”
Directed By: Glenn Miller (Not that one)
Yeah you’re reading that right. And look at that poster. Drink it in man…
(Yes that’s a foreign poster, but look how awesome it is)
“A flame-thrower man, can you believe it? Patrol picked this up off some homeboy on the street.”
Directed By: Jack Sholder
As noted, the 80s were arguably the worst decade for cinema. This could be because nothing was ever going to top the 70s, when artists had free reign (And studios learned what that entailed). With the advent of the blockbuster in the previous decade, the studios took hold and pulled a tight leash over anyone who had dare been touting their artistic ambition just a few years previously. Francis Ford Coppola for example had gone from The Godfather to One From The Heart in just a couple of years.
So while conventional wisdom is that the 80s were largely pretty terrible, it was the decade that mid to low budget movies could still flourish, and something like The Hidden could be made.
“Hey, Harry! What color eyes your stewardess have… had?”
Directed By: Jeffrey Bloom
See, this is what happens when you watch a movie based solely on its poster. I had actually seen that awesome image above years ago and, having been schooled in the ways of how these things grossly misrepresented themselves, knew better than to expect what delights that art offered.
“Beaver Patrol!”
Directed By: Umberto Lenzi
Were the 80s the worst decade for film? Arguably so. Personally I don’t think the rot set in until about 85 or so and then lasted until some time in the early 90s. By that logic, 1989 is the nadir of cinema. Certainly when movies like Nightmare Beach are involved, you come to believe it.
“Well, let’s go rustle up some menfolk.”
Directed By: Stephen Tyler (Not that one)
Ok yeah so this is probably one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. It fills that hole like Manos: The Hands Of Fate or The Room where the ineptitude has to be seen to be believed. For my mind it’s probably even worse than The Room, which is an impressive feat if you know anything about that.
“Mocata isn’t going to miss the chance of giving Simon his Devil’s baptism at the Grand Sabbat of the year!”
Directed By: Terence Fisher
Satan. He’s not just for metal lovers. Ever since there’s been horror (As vague a term as that is) there’s been Satan, hanging around, tempting people with his mischievous ways. So, what does The Devil Rides Out offer us, and does it add anything to the long lines of cinematic Satans?
“You don’t understand. He likes to chase skunks in the woods, and if he finds them he tries to mate with them. Only skunks don’t like to mate with poodles, and then they spray him, and he really gets turned on!”
Directed By: Robert Scott
I have some vague memories of The Video Dead (And who wouldn’t, look at that art), ones that usually get mixed up with the similar Terrorvision. I can’t be the only one either, Shout! Factory recently released the two movies together on Blu-Ray. But I was more or less going in blind with this one. So does a horror movie from the golden age of direct-to-video releases have anything to offer?
“Emilio! He killed his wife, his mother-in-law and his sister-in-law with a meat cleaver. Whack! Whack! Whack! You’d better stand over there.”
Directed By: William Castle
Right before he made Homicidal, William Castle had to get this very different family friendly movie out there on release. This time the gimmick being “Illusion-O” and allowing you, the audience to see – or not see – the titular ghosts. But does it hold up at home?
“Is that all you’re gonna do this weekend? Smoke dope?”
Directed By: Steve Miner
Well, it wouldn’t be a 31 Nights of Frights without a little detour into Jason Vorhees territory. So here we are with one of the more ok(?) entries into the series. I had originally intended to look at another William Castle flick after last night’s Homicidal but well…I changed my mind. Is that ok?
Is This Thing On? 